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Joke of the Day:
In Las Vegas, a man finds himself in a hotel; he didn't want to be alone in the room, so he calls a hooker. The hooker arrived, the first thing that she said was "I want to tell you right up front, my minimum fee is $500, and that's for a hand job." The hooker points out in the window, and pointing to an expansive Mercedes, and said, " see that? I own that because of what I can do with my hands."
He was surprised, but what the hell, he did it anyway, which turns out to be a fantastic blowjob. So he said, "How much do you get for pussy?" then the women replies "Do you see the hotel sitting there on the corner? I could own that if I had a pussy!"

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